Trusting Intuition...

Dappled   oil/canvas   30 x 40 x 1.5

Trusting your own intuition is difficult to do. But the more it is trusted, the easier it is the next time around.....and the easier...and the easier. I have learned to trust mine, even if it means the demise of a painting. In other words, I would rather take the painting where my intuition leads me, spending more hours of problem-solving, than play it safe. Whoa......did I just say that? "Dappled" lead me on quite the supreme adventure! The color evolved from bright emerald green to blue-green to turquoise. The background started out as a barn, then suggestions of a barn to nothingness. The cropping of the horse kept returning, even though I thought I was changing it. The dappled horse went from solid to transparent to everything in-between. This painting holds the dubious distinction of being the longest-time-wise-painting-ever for me............over 4 months of facing the canvas with nothing more to guide me than my intuition. I checked and rechecked my original sketch. I made more sketches. Can you feel my desperation? This horse lives down the street from me. There were times that I couldn't even look at her as I passed by....too much frustration. I was ready to give up countless times. Lucky I was using oil paint. I knew then that I had arrived when my intuition told me I had. I felt that the painting said what I needed it to say. The essence of dappled. It works for me. Another notch scratched on my studio wall for the unknown.

When Things Go Awry.............

Dappled   oil/canvas   30 x 40 x 1.5

When I was 12 or so, all I thought about was horses. I drew them continually. I thought that I could draw them blindfolded. I even dressed like Lori Martin, the young star of the television show "National Velvet". I now live in a semi-rural community where horses are often seen grazing in the late afternoon sun. So, I thought that my painting of a grazing horse would be a shoe-in (no pun intended). WRONG. The painting was begun in November with all of the preparatory sketches drawn beforehand. This painting has since evolved at least a half of a dozen times. Each time I think I have a handle on making this horse my very own, the visuals go awry, the forms are either hugely boring or refusing to be broken up in a pleasing way. And so it goes. I will not give up, but have mixed in a few other paintings to dissolve my frustration. Today I will go at it again. I will show up for work. However, this horse is so shy that he may never make an appearance.